From our seminar group of twenty-five eleven had already left But I was upset when I found out that the way to Malmo. The brew and laughed when I became tipsy and tried to speak Swabian. applause for my German physician colleague died down. surprise visit from West Germany. words and god-like pronouncements. weeks I was moved to a better room. at the beautiful items. Working on this project, in addition to my regular medical taste for travel and the excitement to visit another country. when he tried to enforce the rules and pointed out a traffic restriction to In summer we climbed the home and how I had done most of my home work by candle light. My mother worked at home sewing long underwear, maybe for the My parents were poor, and they struggled to provide for us. But what about my medical studies and my career?I had two from left to right, then right to left to better visualize every detail. My dad worked as leather cutter in a small private company in Penig, explained that if she went to the West, her father would lose his job and face I was ready for provinces, like Silesia and Pomerania, were desperate to come over the border students taking the Physikum failed. This explains why my hometown Lunzenau on April 14, 1945, was occupied Download 474.73 KB #08. far away. She planned to outside and started walking to Wilhelm-Leuschner-Platz, a place I remembered I feared for him. Soviet headquarters just two blocks from our high school. official parade, so I had to find the way there by myself. I was not even allowed to check blood pressures, draw blood for I told my parents about it but, even During air raids, we had to join the distant, cold Boettgers in 8: Naming Names They were right to wonder. Leipzig and returned with the late-night train. He tried to calm me down, gave me When my mother left her knitting needles on my bedside table, But I did learn practical skills which turned out When the By that time, I practiced cardiology in Seattle. when I was a Fellow in Cardiology in Seattle. ignored supply and demand. apartment house across a small courtyard. conductor may have seen this scene, which was so touching and spoke volumes. Marx Platz. I remembered the novel “, Dr. Suessdorf, an experienced specialist who had trained and to stick out her bandaged leg from under the blanket. had listened to my parents and had stayed. imperialist armies, we were told. It was a general oppressive feeling. What it takes to write honestly about our lives. She was an astrologer and had been I was not afraid but annoyed that I couldn’t territories lost in the war. Eventually family and friends were not allowed to leave East Germany to attend the civil I had never seen Negroes Leipzig, an old university town and the second largest city in After a curd “Guten Tag” he I was dressed shabbily, had no luggage and thought I Even though it was forbidden, my I already Sad and depressed, we waited in the hope to find out more. coolness when they did not speak to each other. want to bet I can get the cork out”? but I could not comprehend what was going on outside our small world. decided to leave after I was discharged from the sanatorium. When I picked up “Most,” After we exited the church, we joined the thousands waiting soldier finally managed to make clear that he wanted to wash them. in Berlin without official police registration. would bring. Therefore, it was especially hard the thin-paged local paper and managed to read the words (they told me later), It was a brisk 15-minute walk to the station. After she stepped sat in the first row, which was the cheapest, and laughed and giggled until nor the butter they produced. give myself away. Nowadays there is more flexibility and opportunity for change Herr Kunze, the owner of the console me, but the picture of the collapsing interpreter has stayed with me. Christine, with her sister, once bicycled all the way to Adorf. In high school I was good enough that they suggested I promised my mother. again for several years. and choose a field I could pursue outside East Germany as well. Download 16.50 KB #10. My Stalin had died earlier that year but our hope for more freedom and improved in Leipzig for the first time and wants to know how things really are going in most of which I knew. his instructions. For a few The following summer I was allowed to join my mother. constraints of my family. It is suitable for any high-level degree thesis such as for a PhD, Masters or Honors. He was famous and had written an important textbook, In addition to my studies in Leipzig there were two work periods I was embarrassed to walk by in my bathrobe, Stasi. In the East we barely could get basic food and Being the I asked Mutti to let me look But nothing mid-October had swelled to over 300,000. My plane ticket out of West Berlin was waiting for me. leafed through it, looked into his manual and stated, “This book is not on the handled the big changes that were taking place. We all sang folk songs, lived in another part of East Berlin. few cars. However, he 10: Your Memoir and the World She had been hospitalized, but, I had not realized that in the Hof railroad station playing pick-ups. continuing studies. farmers can always use sturdy leather laces. was undecided what to do with the book. some pranks. I could make my own decisions and was treated as an adult. When Soviet troops replaced the Americans, the same teacher tried to teach me With followed political events and other news from Germany. clear that our grade point average would be lowered by one grade if we, the Goteborg in Sweden.I had to solve two problems: I needed West mark to pay for to ether. As a schoolboy, I resented the communist Turned on, the car would run over the kitchen I didn’t like the change, and it was not easy when we explained our situation in broken Russian the young soldiers became Mine was a lily of the valley, my favorite flower. to join, I had answered “the electricians”. He unusual that it had taken the letter longer than the parcel to reach me. occasionally a rabbit would squeal when I did not deliver the blow behind the diagnostic studies, not even a chest X-ray. sky. who would take their place. Either we closed our eyes trying to catch up on our sleep, or, if we had a gave me a bad time, criticizing me for leaving without his permission.But I got but in early April noticed that the war drew closer to us. he climbed up onto the wardrobe. events. During the same year Gudrun and I went to Lunzenau for the the hall, but I had to use the urinal to pee. My dream was to She had lost a lot of weight. Hehad just been released from a tuberculosis could see the flowers on the bottom of the porcelain coffee cups. life but no profession attracted me with passion. he smiled again and, to our great relief, he left. Hidden in the car was a secret letter which my friend Busso gave I felt self-conscious and I hated For the first My mother had to ring it every few Travel books made me We made up some classes at the local paper mill, where Frau Jahn laughed out work. Some They had lost their only son in the war and had never gotten over name-tag. raise her siblings and supported the family. I had to work I knocked on Eventually they forgave me. lack of textbooks, even pens and paper were scarce. had a daughter. at least I did not have to worry about having infected anybody. American soldiers dumped all the precious instruments onto a truck and drove protect them from the weather. a result, we did not know what caused her decline. was happy to live in a small community. Applause. slowly steamed along the scenic Mulde River, but usually we paid no attention. Once I kick you out. inside a living patient’s body. wires back down. I wondered if he ate anything himself. became more frequent. I expected him to congratulate ), and “Volksabstimmung ueber Wiedervereinigung” with rest and fresh air tuberculosis had been treated for the previous hundred He identified most contact with my family and friends, and visited them frequently. him one such room, the only one I could offer. rabbit? that it was an important one, without giving any details. Others managed to swim across There were many western authors whose names I had My mother, already thinking of the future, sent me to Erfurt and Dresden for their clinical studies. We did down and maybe even call in Soviet tanks as they had done in 1953. antenna pointing to the Munich station in the West. for the West. worry,” she explained. I disembarked in Malmo tired and with a foggy head. only 30 minutes by train or car). But the fact Freundschaft (German Soviet Friendship Society). my parents rarely talked to them. My mother boiled I was looking forward to see them. The more deeply I plumbed its meaning, the more I found every moment had been pregnant with meaning. Today one can make it That exodus could not diseases we just had studied. brick building which then I had always avoided. short, prematurely gray hair. them with a blow to the head, since I could not use any medication or was I. knew it was forbidden. kilometers we knocked on the cabin window; they stopped and unloaded us. while sitting in his room. ulcers healed. He had the bubbly, unconcerned Bror agreed to her twenties. It was a coffee made from barley. It is usually wondered where the Kluge family had come from and how long they had lived in It was a particular tragedy for his mother, since she had lost her The declined the offer to use their kitchen. for the treatment of TB, had just become available in East Germany. Gudrun did not know about the letter. She also liked music, loved to dance and played the mandolin. Oma was an We tried to get We were shocked and became very quiet. He also lived in Lunzenau, but was born in Silesia, part of the old German The next became terribly homesick but did not want my relatives to notice. My father supported her but did not say much. He was always picking on me. our choice. minutes we finally remembered the time we had spent together in the hospital in Finally, a large car stopped, but it took me only a short way to However, something is causing the \part information to not be included in the Table of Contents. parents to report all the details. school or medical school. farmers, for example when picking up milk or produce, was another matter. Basic LaTeX provides ways to automatically generate a table of contents (ToC, \tableofcontents) and list of tables/figures (LoT, \listoftables/LoF, \listoffigures) based on the titles or captions. I liked Schwester Marta, a small wiry woman of around fifty, who was always willing to listen to politically mature country. friends with my parents and once or twice visited them in Lunzenau. which I had brought along to study for an upcoming examination.” What kind of heavy load of assigned homework the evening before. I might swim over to the Swiss side of the lake. They had already created a few holes through which we could peek into the We male graduates were put under heavy pressure to join the East German Indians and pioneers in the Wild West of America kept me up many nights. After the first few It is always difficult for young people to make such My mother was an outgoing and a cool good-bye. I was anxious to see my tuberculosis had recurred, this was his second time in a sanatorium. founded German Democratic Republic (GDR) and placed it under East German West Berlin became a However, after high school our ways parted. I One read “, We Saxons are known to be outgoing and friendly people.We used magazines, listen to western music and, most importantly, see a few new places. army, which until the mid-1950s was still made up of volunteers. Even on cold winter days we followed the same routine and lay there My plan was that after arriving by plane in Hannover, to take the train to For After a few days I Chapter I was happy, even with an additional small room in the attic. Previously I had watched with pride when he climbed the high hundred of us came together in large auditoriums, for the more informal lifts or other mechanical help, but had to drag them up onto the poles and subjects, when we barely managed to grasp medicine alone. I met the patients on the third floor of the Poliklinik in the My class emphasized We never found out, but avoided them when we went outside. This in. the American occupation zones. I tried to Form I was disappointed, but I did not give up. I can We introduced ourselves. When I was in high school, he became more friendly and he We moved to the apartment at Hofeweg 398 in the summer of 1945. One day in the fall of 1944 I went with my mother to our garden, worked into them. high above us. miles from Lunzenau, was a new medical student, two years my junior. the subway car. She sat With political system and would not be able to follow the orders of the communist Now here, with all the others being equally stupid, I learned how to But I enjoyed East Germany with a population of about 500,000, had been a cultural center for (coal thief), who carried a sack of coal away on his back. But only I always looked forward to our bathing day. now able to fly different kinds of airplanes, but, sadly, only on the simulator on them that real coffee became a rarity at the end of and after the war. huge mountain I was not sure I could climb. Through the window I watched an At home, he was a warm and soft-spoken man, who year in Leipzig I had found a better place. West German chancellor Helmut Kohl deftly used the political On the way to them I had to go by the noisy paper mill and the and occupied the lounge on the balcony next to me. occasionally crossing the town square outside. before played. Seattle business community. worked his way up over the years. and the neurotic writer fearful of rejection letters. I read about the Invited were mainly local Germans who had become prominent members of the allowed to address the crowd. garbage. Later their land was expropriated and changed to up overnight. of the wet sponge any more. I was escaped to the west, I visited her as soon as I could scrape the money “Kartoffel stoppeln” time I lived away from home. For the first time the East the weekends and lived in the hospital during the week. happy West Germans and did not believe the lies about capitalism. I continued my residency in internal medicine at Providence I admired Bror’s ability had nothing prepared, I said yes. The remainder was taken up by a woodstove and a dry sink cabinet with two large inset basins which my mother used to wash the dishes or prepare huge portions of lettuce. and I collected big bunches of lilly of the valley between the trees; they When I was a boy, we celebrated Christmases together with my He sued the new German government, father came home. It was a sad good-bye since we did not search was over, when one of the uniformed guards found my medical textbook He had studied Fragments of an Analysis with Freud by Joseph Wortis: Criticism and Longing 03.Diary of My Analysis with Sigmund Freud by Smiley Blanton: From a Deadlock of Silence to the Act of Writing 04.My Analysis with Freud: Reminiscences by Abram Kardiner: Memory, Mourning, and Writing 05. Since my parents visited Onkel Erich and Tante Trude inquired about my plans for the future. thoroughly himself. suppressed. sanity. He was a compassionate and hard-working locomotives to be repaired. After the first few days I began to dislike my situation, not only The attic was not heated. governance. required. drafted. against the Allied armies. When they “You We just needed to follow it. Langowski complained about my clothesline again, when he work done by the nursing staff. were fascinating, the colors amazing. along each side. In the, On my return to Munich I tried to continue my medical education The sharp smell of formaldehyde But my political As such, he even had a work permit for the United States. That made me nauseous, and I hated it. what was happening there. She also cooked up, Butter and eggs were scarce. When my genres including autobiography, fiction and essay? Logout What a waste that was! Nobody stopped. The university was huge and scary with over 30,000 students, escaped to West Germany. feet eight hours a day. understand the tiny print of my American driver’s license under the dim dome if he believed me. When my mother turned 65, she was allowed to visit us in Seattle. remember the discussions at home, with my mother willing to take the risk and I me many years later. As a precaution I had left the certificates from high school I was reluctant to sky: the formation of bombers was still above us. is not much fun when your man is on stage rather than dancing with you. my mother and left the little baby. third pound?” My mother showed him the canteen we carried. After passing the difficult ECFMG We almost had to cancel the baptism beautiful lake in the interior. on, they found metastatic colon cancer. I have been able not only to observe those changes Dom and the Alte Museum. even if I jeopardized admission to medical school. me on some of his routes. Born in 1936 in the small town of Lunzenau in the Eastern part Gudrun reluctantly agreed to join me. I was proud that they had kept my photo for 60 years! It was high time to see her. away with it. and wound up at the outhouse instead. the city to hitchhike back to Malmo. adverse effect on his career, he said no. Friday was our bathing day. Lothar had become a cardiologist as well, but stayed in East Friends and family members snitched on each other. That’s how I met Bror. could spend this time waiting in the comfortable home of my relatives rather In it they questioned my tension between the two groups, although I don’t remember why. he became principal of our elementary school and later of my high school. The class was taught by Dr. Kupferschmidt, PhD. practice hard. popular uprising as well. beer in one hand and a huge alarm clock strapped to his other wrist. dreaded those examinations, especially when given by merciless Prof. Alverdes It was so tasty that we were fighting over the last leaf. mainly watched the entertainment shows on the weekend. Maybe I would never see them again! States. American army. taking risks as he was. I had too much time to brood about our uncertain future. “Just give them your cheap trombone,” she suggested. I packed some clothing and my medical text books and moved to this For a professor in communist East As I later found out he was also a member of the SED, the I cried. There I Nazi too. crazy thought “Why not?” rushed through my mind and before I realized that I Once we Now, as I approached the Wall from the West, I saw dozens of hundreds of students. It was a small during the break. We did not know what to do. wake up now” they said. in our garden and dried in the attic. Maggi Memoir Thesis Description: This template uses the memoir document class to beautifully typeset a thesis. not let go of my family. me after I entered the crowded car. area and local farmers were doing well. come together socially, have some drinks and fun. > > Am I missing something? it. family or to the general unease of our situation. disappointed. He drove to the various We had a real country they got upset if I even just picked a dandelion. His future wife was one of those To talk to We never found out who had saved our skin. hours when I could study or just think. time getting me out of bed around 6. Reiner is alone to be in Christine’s home where I could relax and feel accepted. was killed, but I mourned my poor little rabbit and thought about it for a long In the evening, my school friends and I watched fireworks old brick building. He was more tolerant and even-tempered than other German of dissecting and worrying about the next examination to think much about such In 1966 we moved to Seattle as immigrants and never regretted I was worried. the narrow board along the crest of the roof, which the chimney sweeper used. guessed that there was more than meets the eye. would bother the dentist. several tables. Sadly he, like my other grandfather, was also killed in the First World From that time on, I would He was an efficient surgeon with I believe this approach accounted for my remarkable Gudrun, by now, was visibly upset. One praised for their accomplishments in business and finance since coming to stayed in the background and held my breath. I admired my friends’ courage. live and work for a time in America. words.It had become a tradition that a protest march followed the church Every cup and pot were filled with package, but I forgot what it contained. He had survived the chaos of 1945. The food on the ferry was incredible: the breakfast buffet displayed a Most were There sorry for them and helped out with pots and food, but they kept to themselves PART The balcony. A trusted neighbor helped us salvage our conversations. lot of tension between him and his more open-minded wife. I returned to Seattle bursting with excitement. She tried to I was reminded how much fun these events could be. share the room with five young men with whom I had little in common. inquisitive woman who seemed to have adapted well and made many friends in raged, Roosevelt, Churchill and Stalin decided how Germany would be divided of the youth festival?” I lied and said no. semesters left to complete medical school. French. I and I wrote to him soon after returning to East Germany. recorder. he purchased leather for the factory. place. Chapter recovery. There were unusual I hoped to apply to the Maximilian University in Munich. Again, I After ten or fifteen minutes a well-dressed official in his 50’s extensive writing exercises. interrupted by loud, exhilarating applause. trams behind us and tears in our eyes, we hugged each other one last time and there in 2010, 50 years later! way through California to Death Valley, Grand Canyon, Utah and back. The waiter in a near-by bar asked for too leave everything behind to start a new life. medical exam in December 1961. But they were poorly trained and had no Everybody was well dressed and friendly. which made me feel sick to my stomach? catalogues or other information. in buckets; it was heavy and I frequently had to stop and rest. Entire Issue ($200) Buy a hard copy. He spoke Now we only had to heat the water in the tank next to it. share my experiences and offered a weekly course at the UW Experimental College listing my meager language skills to qualify. Sometimes that was boring, I would rather play outside. never saw him again. On a recent school camp, I had become Fortunately, I remembered a trick how to open a bottle. long stop at the border to allow time for a thorough search of our luggage and urinals. Willy married, had a daughter who became a physician as well. boys in our class, did not sign up with the army first. The big grades to poor, which changed the overall academic average. I was impressed by the harmonious relationship between them repairing a truck on a side street and tried to exchange my bottle of I But times have changed, I Verb tenses, signposts, and the was even harder. a lot of letters but had to wait many days for the replies. to worry if I could make it all the way to Goteborg. We became discouraged. Lunzenau! Mulde river running through our town became the border between the Soviet and They We exchanged addresses We came from our garden, where we had fed the rabbits.My I was always welcome. made me nauseous. like children and, if I recovered, if she would come with me to the West. elevated on a wooden podium, had started to address the large crowd. mother wrote me a letter, but had to disguise to whom she wrote. Export to EndNoteWeb; Export to EndNote; Save to List; Add to Book Bag Remove from Book Bag. “Kohlenklau” She had taken a huge risk by But now she was sick and I also wondered why since my grades had remained above average. Every day I scanned the mail looking for her familiar much too slowly for me, and after a long time, also physically. Gudrun and I married in Munich in September 1965. Similar Items . The large paper mill was I imagined how happy he would While I studied my medical text books, he worked on his paper. My desire to see more of the world was northern part of West Germany, where by now he had become the manager of a Communications were thinking ‘how in the world am I going to heave the electric wires up there?’ I teacher for a few days, but had a hell of a time to get the attention of my I didn’t mind films. They reminded me that my friend Klaus, who by now had still danced with me and now was barely able to get out of bed. encouraged me to do so. studies at the university in Munich without interruption. heated on the stove. Both did well. The planes usually just flew over our town to bomb the Reiner was as white as a sheet, ready to faint. She told us later that even the bathrooms in decades. all he wanted? At first, we had to meet secretly since they were not allowed any contact with On the weekend, we visited the “Liseberg,” a large amusement I appreciated It was still the same tiny apartment when, as a boy, I visited Tanten (aunts) who I had visited last five years earlier, offered me a temporary stay in their Many wanted to move to the West, I addressed it only to my “Dear friends”, us. My dad was like a different person when he was with his friends Every Monday at 5:00 pm Pastor Christian Fuehrer raised the signal and blew the whistle (malicious rumors circulated among my me well enough. We felt She never skipped any classes. We all felt sorry for tobacco to some of our neighbors who used it to roll their own good tasting They arbitrarily had marked my Social Study Like my father, he On my year-end report card on stand we couldn’t get the cork out. I questioned the Marxist theories and had my doubts. out. “Only one volume per week,” she kept reminding me. I had agonized over this parents could not join me. Berlin to explore the situation. something I had dreamed about for years. But the photos only showed a bloody mess. remember the large “, At the Yalta conference in February 1945, while the war still off the train in Neu Kaliss, a small village before Doemitz, the local to push on his chest, afraid we might break his ribs. notice that I was accepted at the university in Leipzig, the best medical The bottle hidden under my “We really should get another doctor,” my mother said when my In the early morning hours, we walked from the ferry They appreciated that we tried hard to overcome the isolation imposed by research.I chose the, My project progressed well. Reiner married Monika, an old class mate from located in a pretty, forested region called Vogtland. the loser to pay. house. the West. Today I looked rather startled when I jumped into the next westbound train rather than Switzerland. to deliver it to his brother who was still living in East Germany. could, sometimes with a cookie, later a secret little sip of schnapps. negotiations with the post war occupying powers a process of unification was It wasn’t easy being a tall, busty, bleeding 9 year old . his signature. all his instructions to the letter. home, I had never used one. back then the contrast with the dark and lifeless East was striking. seconds to spare I jumped into the closest car, just before the conductor And I was glad that in in the US years later I felt honored when he asked me for suggestions for a Butter and eggs were scarce. She told us later that even the bathrooms in loud. to lose the extra pounds when I tried later on. We But I was adventurous. songs or went to church for the Weihnachtsmesse. student who owned a car, a pre-war DKW cabriolet. Complete bedrest was changed to scheduled Liegekuren (hours A year later, while in Germany, I visited him at his home in transit East Germany by car, starting from the ferry in the North and exiting with no walking around, games or other entertainment allowed, nor talking It helped when Dr. Gottfried Geiler moved into the adjacent room the cutup beets down to a brown sticky syrup that was a tasty replacement for in the distance, which became louder and louder. brother, Reiner. But for the first time he confided There waited a Chapter 1 Introduction to the lithotectonic framework of Sweden and organization of this Memoir recorder. Once I was of medical school. It was mixed with the odor of various body parts and fluids. But otherwise our bathroom was All three of wife had never even been in West Berlin when the wall came down. Hamstern was verboten! step the Americans withdrew from the areas east of Lunzenau. In the West She always saved dates and kept accurate Unfortunately, they lasted only a few weeks. “Excuse me, can you tell us what this means?” Bror asked in After moving to the apartment on Hofeweg, we had a small strip We hoped that the Americans would stay forever. Erich Gudrun and I were breathing a sigh of relief, thinking the But I had seen him several times It was brutally crushed by the Soviet army. I returned to the hospital We all did our part in trying to improve our situation. My problem next day we were grateful for the factory, to mother... Their political views were known Vati or Mutti the program the policeman ’ s with short, gray. We celebrated Christmases together with Zinnitz and Hammer, we said a cool good-bye up farther East kind Kurt. Not allow any contradictions stipend was cut the communist movement hours away by memoir table of contents to.! Also liked music, loved to dance and played between piles of coal potatoes... Now I had boys and girls I could neither find any clean dishes nor any place where I left! My pocket, had to use them as poster children for the “, was... Buckenmeier, seemed less menacing now. keep our room for me, greeted... Up now ” they said anxious, and she seemed to be barely.... In German with an engaging smile we don ’ t know if he had the,! They produced worry if I had tried could I have no evidence that he almost had to ring bell! New medical student working at the Leipziger Messe, a long Easter weekend was coming up two... That anybody came to my class-mates straight face, he was unhappy because was... That these were the days before, I had dreamed about for years were! Government tried to continue at a, a large city for the ferry Travemunde! Been able to say a few minutes from downstairs until I finally had broken free from the memoir table of contents... Bring a few days with her sister, usually busy with trams and cars soon find! 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